Airhen

Your Bat/Bar Mitzfah: Reviewed 12 Years Later

I went to a college where a only small percentage of people could relate to this. I think that’s why I opted for an early graduation.

I still can’t believe my friend Merav didn’t give me a candle to light, considering whom she did give a candle to.

natashavc:

J. Edwick

Sect: Reform

Location: Chatsworth Equestrian Center

Theme: Horseback riding

Lowlight: the entire 7th grade figuring out that I was wearing a padded bra.

Highlight: nice candles, scented oil, SWAG

* * *

M. Rothman

Sect: Reform

Location: Marriot, Woodland Hills

Theme: Shopping

Highlight: keepsake credit cards that had our name and seating placement. I was seated at the ‘Wet Seal’ Table

Lowlight: Ryan threatening never to speak to me again unless I gave him a handjay in the bathroom

* * *

E. Woods

Sect: Conservative

Location: Temple Aliyah

Theme: Musicals. (I was seated at “Guys and Dolls”)

Highlight: Flirting with your insanely hot older brother who drove a mustang.

Lowlight: Not getting a shout out during your candle lighting ceremony.

* * *

B. Haft

Sect: Reform

Location: Calabassas Country Club

Theme: Punk Rock. I was seated at ‘CRASS TABLE’

Highlight: Being allowed to smoke cigarettes in front of the adults.

Lowlight:There were many high school girls there. They wore lots of eye make up and were unquestionably super bad ass shikas.

* * *

A. Newman

Sect: Conservative

Location: Service at the Temple, Party was at YANKEE DOODLES SPORTS BAR

Theme: McDonalds (she was photoshopped into pictures of her sliding down the golden arches)

Highlight: Codified my reputation as a MUST HAVE guest to the rest of the B-Mitzfahs

Lowlight: Seeing my best friend’s mom work her day shift as a cocktail waitress at the bar we were partying in.

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From today's "Vows" column

What seemed a promising turn in their relationship was dashed when he began introducing her to his friends as his godsister. “Oh, he does not think of me as a potential dating person,” she recalled thinking.

Ew.

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» Biking the 50 States

joecarryon:

I’m going to read this entire blog the next time I’ve got a sick day. It gives me seriously itchy feet.

Are they riding a recumbant bike?

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It's my birthday

I’m 29 now, and until I turn 30, I’ll take a picture of one person every day and have them* tell me about their most-memorable birthday. I’ll post on my shiny new blog, Hello, Birthday.

*I am totally aware that my pronoun should be singular, but I couldn’t do it gracefully.

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“ With nothing more than a phone book, a nail file, and a few hours at her disposal, my mother, like all mothers in the area, could quite effectively have arranged the fate of the planet.

—

From “Made in Detroit,” by Paul Clemens (via cakeordeath)

Mary finds the one good line in that book.

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» "I wish they would just fabricate the news entirely, and make something that at least reads like it's not an insult to the customer."

(via alexbalk)

This is about The Baltimore Sun, which makes me sad. I don’t think it’s that reporters are lazy, though, just that they’re writing too many stories every day.

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Service-y

Inspired by Sezarac Attack to add comments and an e-mail address. The comments might get embarrassing once I realize they’re stuck at 0 forever.

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sazerac:

Meet the peanut butter/jelly/chocolate chip/banana panini. File under: disgusting meals dreamed up in the final miles of a long bike ride.

I believe that sandwich (non-panini style) is pictured, with the addition of pretzels, on the Peanut Butter Jam Web site.

Also, on Ragbrai you would never have such a fancy beer option at a stop.

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“ Oh, Jake,” Brett said, “we could have had such a damned good time together.”
Ahead was a mounted policeman in khaki directing traffic. He raised his baton. The car slowed suddenly pressing Brett against me.
“Yes,” I said. “Isn’t it pretty to think so?

— The end of “The Sun Also Rises” popped into my head while running in a thunderstorm this afternoon. I could barely see through the raindrops on my glasses and was feeling unmoored trying to recognize my life. I stopped at a light and thought up some lies to tell myself.

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» "Chartreuse is famously made from a secret blend of 130 herbs, plants and flowers, and the full recipe is known only to two Carthusian monks who have taken a vow of silence."

From a Washington Post story on spirits (the alcohol kind).

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